I was privileged to contribute a chapter to the book "The Selfless Leader," available at no cost here. Rather than toot my horn as one of the contributors, I'd rather point you to the words of the editor, Scott Rodin of the Steward's Journey, who blogs here.
"Perhaps the best way I can try to define a Selfless Leader is to contrast it with its opposite. Could we say that the converse of a self-less leader is a self-more leader? Put another way, does becoming a selfless leader require us to set aside our desires to want more of our self as the focus of our leadership?